Life Balance is a Roller Coaster

Every child of an aging parent grapples with the feeling she should be with their parent more. It’s a classic guilt smoothie.

Every working mother fights the feeling she should be at home with her child when she’s not home with her child.

When you are caring for children and caring for an aging parent—fasten your seat belt, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.

But sometimes bumpy rides are the most fun. Do you see people lining up at their state fair to pay money to ride around the block in a smooth Cadillac? That smooth ride may be easy; it may not cause you any conflict or give you a bruise. But it probably won’t create a memory either.

I’ve had my fill of bumpy rides over the past 10 years—bumpy to the point of asking the sketchy carnie to stop the ride and let me off. And I’d be lying if I said I really liked all the memories the past years have created for me—the time my mom was diagnosed with cancer on her tongue; the time my dad told me he’d call the sheriff if I didn’t give him the car keys; the times my son forgot his lunch and his homework and his gym shorts and I had to drop them off when I was supposed to be at a meeting, the time my dad threw up in the car. But what I do know for sure (thanks for coining that phrase, Oprah) is that the bumps make life interesting. They create character and they peel back the onion of our lives to see what the core is. Sometimes, it makes you cry, often it smells, but the onion usually adds a lot of flavor too.

When you find yourself on the roller coaster of life—go along for the ride. But make sure your ride has a few fun moments—hugs and laughs and milkshakes—and that it’s not all scary. And that the carnival guy running the ride has a few teeth and doesn’t smell like whiskey.

And it’s always best to check the safety belt.